So, people who know me know that I am a proud advocate for owning it, and for the fact that there are body types other than the Barbie and Ken. But a bromo has stumbled upon something that even he himself has found issue with (and no, it isn’t referring to myself in the third person as some kind of super-douche). I found that bromos, even in striving to respect people regardless and/or because of their difference (it doesn’t matter which, just as long as respect is given), sometimes cannot escape certain self-defeating behaviors when it comes to the body.
Everybody and every body is beautiful, but bromos sometimes have a hard time figuring this concept. As far as I can count them, there are about four different realms that have an effect on the bromo’s body—it’s like earth having four moons orbiting it, each one’s gravitational force working to pull it this way or that. Thing is, there are never all four in one direction, so there is always a fundamental conflict. Didn’t know I could talk that theoretical lingo, nah?
Anyway, the bromo has to contend with these four moons, right? They’re Society’s Projection of the Male (which is invariably a heterosexual projection ), Straight Male’s Projection of the Male Body (because straight males have more power in society, they get to call the shots of what the body should look like), Society’s Projection of the Gay Body (any number of contradictory stereotypes that confine the bromo to look like an feminized man or body builder), and Gay Culture’s Body Preference (in which you get many of the various body types from twink/musclehead/bear/etc.).
So you’ve got these four moons pulling, pulling, pulling on the body, and you just don’t know what to do or where to go. As bromos, we are put into very difficult positions, because, unless we are strong enough to not give a fuck hoot about what society thinks, we tend to go around trying to please everyone. And how in the world are you supposed to look buff for a party in the Hamptons this weekend while simultaneously trying to convince your boyfriend’s mom that you are a sweet and delicate piece of pie. Shit don’t work, do it?
That said, this is an individual journey, but it doesn’t have to be walked alone: Support a bromo with an eating disorder; help him discover candied yams and what it’s like to have a hug when the other person is not afraid to rip him in two. Tell a bromo who’s constantly at the gym and taking questionable powders and pills that he can be healthy without the overkill. I mean, fuck the bullshit: Many people aren’t morphing their bodies for themselves; the pain they feel as they deny themselves food or overextend themselves during workout tends to lead to the feeling that they are earning the perfect body—the currency that will make it easier to get where they want.
Personally, I was never medically anorexic, but I did know that by staying skinny (which sometimes meant eating less and doing more cardio), I would attract a certain type of man, get certain types of compliments, and be able to fit into certain kinds of clothes—all of these ‘privileges’ which could be purchased from society if you had the right medium of exchange.
The body is the first thing we see when we meet another person. One would argue that a body is required to meet another person—even online, unless they have a profile pic that is totally sketch, we feel more at ease when we can identify a person by their physical traits and make assumptions based on them.
All that said, this bromo does NOT know how to start this post. If this were a term paper, I would be screwed! Tell me, what is your idea concerning the bromo body?