Fall has fallen, and so have Nicki Minaj’s panties in Superbass the Northern hemisphere’s leaves—usually signaling the New Year in the world of fashion! All bromos are not as fashion-forward as Liberace, or our favorite HBICs Wilhelmina Slater and Miranda Priestly, but no one who sees us can deny that we have style that is all our own. Whether we derive our style by deviating off of current fashions, or we make it up along as we go, a bromo is always a sight to behold.
At any rate, for those of us who can’t pull off the looks seen in Vogue Magazine (or don’t want to dish out $3,000 on a pair of jeans that don’t connect to the internet or even have bluetooth—seriously?! how can people even justify the price of $90 briefs?), here are some tips from one self-describe snazzy dresser to my bromos and divas in distress!
By the way style and fashion are totally different. Style refers to your own likings and affects—the way you put together pieces of clothing and the attitude and values you attribute to your garments when you wear them. Fashion is an industry that promotes consumerism in various textile and dye areas while commodifying culture
If it’s mid-to-late fall, it’s probably going to be a little nippy. A nice dark turtleneck over light corduroy pants with brown shoes (light or dark socks dependent on the overall color scheme) and a black or brown belt presents a very standard and conservative image. If you want to rebel against the hierarchy of light-dark dichromaticism, throw in a bright funky-colored belt: Leaf-colored bright orange or yellow; trying-to-hold-onto-summer sky blue—the possibilities are endless! Tuck in the turtleneck so that your admirers can see how off-the-wall, yet still classy you are. It’s the ultimate irony, and hipsters will probably be all over that next spring!
Also in the spirit of fall, but decidedly less conservative, try some animal-print pants. (I have no idea what animal-print has to do with fall, to be honest.) Leopard-print is a personal fave, but zebra or jaguar couldn’t hurt. And since you’re off the wall like a monkey at this point, a crazy graphic tee couldn’t hurt. And mix it up! If you decide on baggy pants, try for a shrunken/small/form-fitting tee. If you go with tight pants, an oversized tee makes is always eye-catching. I personally prefer a tight-on-top/baggy-on-bottom deal, but I tend to trend casual-formal events with a tight-all-over deal (tight not meaning skin-tight, but form-fitting) and casual outings with baggier apparel. Also, try accessorizing with a scarf or hat. Or, gulp, those lens-less glasses that are so “hip.”
And for the crazy folk that want to usurp Gaga Minaj as a a put-together trainwreck (however that works), go crazy and get wild. “How?” you may ask. Well, it’s a fair—after all, crazy is an acquired taste and the bravery to show your craziness is doubly rare. Well, think about this:
As unbelievably lame as that is (and the fact that it took 30 minutes to make on MS Paint), by letting go, that’s when the genius within starts to shine. When you’re shopping or going through your closet, be careless and pull out things that don’t necessarily match! When you start to put them together, be reasonless and do not justify anything to yourself. Be adamant in your final choice when you find a match you like that doesn’t match. And finally, be zesty and bring some flair and attitude into your choice! whY? I dunno. That’s just how it works.
You might wind up looking like Dobby from Harry Potter, but you’ll be surprised how many people dress up like him for Halloween! And if you carry yourself proudly and boldly in your craziness (toning it down as necessary), you may just start a trend. Or even get a modeling deal, becoming the fashion world’s next IT boy. Bromo Say What?! would totally endorse you if you did!